I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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