I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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