VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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