no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
