Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
