Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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