Best friends brother. Beat that.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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