I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
