Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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