But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
