I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize