I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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