The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
