Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
