I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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