A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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