making cat noises will not fix the situation.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
