Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
