operation harelip BJ is a go
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Randomize
