I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Randomize
