Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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