How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
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