Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize