Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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