Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
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