...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
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