she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize