Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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