i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
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