I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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