i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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