Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
