Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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