names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
she smelled like a LAN party
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
