SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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