all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
