The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
