he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I got inside last night via doggy door
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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