he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize