im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
is it fun? or sober?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
