Screwed.edu
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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