If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
