I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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