Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
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