quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
