Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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