i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
