So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
