So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
