i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Green mimosas i think yes
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
