Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
